Ponderings of a 20-year-old

This still doesn't sound real. Doesn't feel real. And yet here I am, freshly-baked 20-year-old.
My birthday yesterday was felt much more online than in reality. No big party, crazy stuff or crowds. Facebook posts, messages, coffee with a friend and calls from my precious ones did the trick fantastically. I thought of making a new decade's resolution, but who needs it anyway, not everything's about planning or predicting, or hoping for something better than you have all the time and making deadlines for that. So yes, I discovered this special sort of one-day holiday when I allowed myself to just enjoy what I have and not think about any deadlines, assignments, mess in my room or the storm outside. Enjoy my own company in pyjamas, in front of a laptop with a good movie playing. This might sound miserable, but that's really not the worst there is, after wanting a day to do whatever you want and however you want it, without any regrets or inner conflicts. So there's that :)

Changes for good

Only a week ago or so I decided this entirely white wall of my room needed something on it. So I took this big photo of me and my boyfriend he gave me as a present, a drawing my other best friend gave me just before I left for my second year at the uni, some photos with the people I love from this summer and an old picture of me as a child and my mom and put it all into a collage. I think it turned out very nicely. 

This is what the final version of what the composition looks like :)

Best gifts come from the heart

No need to hide it, although we are being modest about this sometimes, we all love getting presents. Some like luxury, some like receiving money and being given the freedom of choice, some never know what they want. But the whole point of giving someone a present is surprising them and showing you truly care about them, isn't it? I don't know your position, but I couldn't agree more. It's not about getting exactly the physical thing you wanted for, it's more about attention. As for me, best gifts ever are those that come from the heart and are given to you regardless of their low cost and simplicity. Members of my family share this opinion as well. Therefore, this Christmas we promised each other we would only give each other gifts made by ourselves. And I think it's fantastic! What if you can't make stuff by yourself, you may ask? You take something simple and turn it into something beautiful. Even if it's only the bag or the envelope that's made by you, it still gives a totally different first impression. You are let to know someone put effort and thought about you, not only went to the shop, bought something random and brought it to you right away. That's what lets you know the other person actually cares, not only does what he or she has to.
What inspired me to write this is actually my best friend's gift I got for my 19th birthday. At first, it all seemed so simple, but now, 6 months later, it means the world to me. A postcard, thyme pastilles and dried cornflowers for the tea - that's what she gave me just before I left and went back to cold and windy Scandinavia. So this evening, when I am feeling weak and feverish, I'm drinking the tea and feeling how the pastilles slowly melt in my mouth, hoping I'll feel better tomorrow because of this small simple gift which was given to me to show how she cared for me. Amazing, isn't it?  :)

Thoughts about saying good-bye

Saying good-bye is not what everybody has a chance to experience, but it is something you never learn how to deal with. It hurts every time, even if it's not forever. And if that wasn't enough, those moments of parting settle in your memory and later become one of the reasons for out-of-nowhere sadness. Especially now, when people freely travel all over the world every day, good-byes are becoming a very common thing. Even children experience that with, for example, their summer camp friends. Also, one mustn't forget about the rivers of tears that are being shed on graduations, in airports, bus and train stations, and, finally, hospitals and cemeteries. In addition to this, couples fall into long distance relationships, children leave their parents, people go on business trips, and soldiers go on missions, knowing they might not come back. But then, there is always some brighter shades regarding some of those points (not the cemeteries, of course). Take, for example, the fact that people make friends all the time. Then, in some cases, it becomes a closed circle: you find friends and leave them, then you do it again and again. But still, I do not believe you can ever put up with the feeling. Oh, and some more news from the bright side: just think how many love songs and letters have been written for the ones who were left alone, especially in the case of LDRs (Long Distance Relationships). From my still lasting experience I can say that this is one of the most morally painful things one can experience. Especially the beginning of it, which is always the worst. As time flies, it gets a little calmer inside, but the pain and sadness never disappear (of course, if the feeling of love remains). Nowadays, it has become an entire new culture: hundreds and hundreds of videos on Youtube, all those previously mentioned songs and cute letters, little gifts, big packages, motivational pictures on the internet... It is surprising how everything has changed to the extent of LDRs when the meeting of a couple in love is actually the first time the two people see each other! So, in conclusion, good-byes are painful, but what comes out of it in some cases is just amazing and couldn't possibly result from anything else.

Cute hand-written letters ^^

I have a really good friend, who used to be my classmate. Sadly, when we graduated last summer, she went to the capital of my home country, and I left for Sweden. Since September 2012, we met only twice: on the Christmas and Easter holidays. Despite that, we stayed really good friends and now we can't wait until the end of June when we will meet and spend the summer together. But for now, although we are a few hundreds of kilometers apart, we still communicate, and the best part is, we do it old school - we send each other long hand-written letters, where we write, draw, share our adventures, worries, and joys. So, I wrote her this letter last night, and I felt like doing something differently. After giving in to this impulse, I ended up drawing this little cute giraffe on the envelope. I bet my friend will be really happy to receive it (last time I wrote some extra quotes on the other side of the envelope, someone crossed them out :( I hope it won't happen this time).

So this is how the letter looked just before I sent it out :)

Hundreds and hundreds of roses

So, this blog post is going to be about something that tends to occur on my Facebook news feed more and more frequently:  pictures of girls with enormous numbers of roses in their hands- usually anniversary gifts from their beloved ones. Of course, there is no way I am going to say this is wrong or inappropriate, I wouldn't mind receiving one myself. What is more, reading comments below those pictures is also something that makes me smile. Cute, cute, cute, that's what envious girls tend to write there. It really is cute. Talking about guys, although they do not usually post comments under this kind of pictures, we can all understand that seeing it on your girlfriend's Facebook wall makes you insanely proud of yourself.
But there is always a 'but'.
To begin with, this kind of gift is very expensive. We can all understand that all those flowers appear in a trash container only a week after they are received. Of course, there are people who can afford this (and not only once), but the point I am trying to make is that this kind of gift is not the most valuable thing you might spend a big amount of money on. Again, I am not saying you should give this money to charity or donate it to someone who might 'need it more than you do'. Every guy should try and make his girl/woman happy, and one mustn't forget about anniversaries. But now I am turning to guys who are not in very good financial state. What should they do? I am sure that seeing your beloved girl posting comments under the pictures with those huge bouquets and knowing you can't afford one hurts, but is it really all about pride and Facebook posts? It seems like we are all starting to believe that yes, it is. But think about it this way: if you are with someone who can't afford that, this, of course, doesn't mean you must hide your high expectations and thoughts. However, if I were this kind of guy, I guess I'd feel the pressure of being able to afford to surprise my girl in a way that I could be proud of what I did, reading those comments under the picture of her, hardly being able to hold all those flowers in her hands. But one shouldn't forget - what we see most often is not all there is. Nobody says you must be the one people should get jealous about once in a while (although I bet his feels really good). What's more to add, giving so many flowers could in some cases be considered as buying attention. However, those who do that shouldn't judge. All I am saying is that it's not yet a must, so guys, there is always something more original and exciting to go for.